Holding the mothers, shifting the emphasis…

Someone just asked for recommendations for books about Attachment theory. There are some good ones, which isn’t what this post is about. It made me ponder this which, if you know me, you will have likely heard me speak about before. If you don’t know me, I hope this helps:

My hope, with many of these books, is that they will one day evolve to reach further than the relationships with the mother / parents and include culture and community. 

It’s always worth remembering, when reading these books and taking in the emphasis they place on the relationship with the mother / parents, that we are not meant to do this alone or in nuclear units as we do in the modern day… my hope is that attachment studies will evolve to include the impact of the withdrawal of community support (through industrialisation / capitalism etc) and how the responsibility is not on the parents alone but also with the communities we live within. 

This is true for books about pregnancy, motherhood and psychology / self help where the emphasis is put on the relationship with, and the psychological / emotional state of, the mother / parents (mostly the mother).

How a mother is held and supported by the wider community through the transitional phases of her life is deeply important in shaping how she is able to show up with her children and is impactful toward their attachment. 

I hope that helps anyone who may need to hear it  xx